Until we announced our decision I didn't realize how much I was hoping for a good reaction from our friends and family. Now, you may be thinking that this is pretty obvious, but I guess I didn't realize how the negative or lack-of feedback would effect me. I tend to not let others bother me so I guess I assumed that it didn't matter what others thought.
I was wrong.
When I mentioned this to a friend that is hoping to adopt in the next few years she said that announcing an adoption is like announcing a pregnancy! We want people to be happy for us! We want them to share in our excitement! People that are anticipating adoption are emotionally pregnant!
For the ones that gave us negative feedback, I'm aware of what their concerns are and why they aren't happy for us. All I can pray is that time will help them embrace this and that our actions and words will relieve their concerns.
Maybe I'm being over-sensitive with the non-feedback. It's just that there were certain places that I got NOTHING. Silence. It certainly surprised me. I guess I would rather negative than nothing. I don't mind answering questions. If you have a question or concern, please ask!
6 comments:
I don't understand how people could not be happy at the prospect of children who need a home getting a loving family. The most worthwhile things are never easy. Praying the Lord will bless this in a big way. Sending hugs your way.
Well, you know where I stand on this adoption thing you're doing. :-) I'm excited for you!
Kim, we too are VERY excited for you guys. It is so neat how God has been working in your hearts to desire to do this. The need is so great for loving parents, and those precious kiddos that end up in your care will be certainly blessed! We will be united to pray for you/with you about it!
Kim, I am so excited for you and your family! We are already praying for the children you don't even know yet, because like you said, you are emotionally pregnant! Just like we don't know if we are having a boy or girl, what they will look like or what their personality will be, you don't know these things about the children who will be part of your family! We already think of them as little Prather's!
I think the silent ones just don't know what to say. Maybe they are facing their own issues on the subject. Others have bought into our world culture of convenience, money for luxuries that are now seen as needs, etc. Many don't even realize how much this contradicts God's word. They haven't even challenged these thoughts in their own mind. They just accept these concepts as truth, and so worry about you and all you will be sacrificing.
You are doing a beautiful thing. You are loving! You are opening your home to children who may never have one without you! You will be blessed in return!!! You will also be a light in this dark world. Your family will teach those around you who have problems with this right now that adoption is a beautiful and wonderful thing, even though some days will be difficult (but aren't they anyway?). You are following God's calling for us to care for the orphans. You are doing what you know God wants your family to do right now. We were never promised that the world would look kindly on following Him, in fact we were promised the opposite. Know that you have a community, a family around you that loves you and COMPLETELY supports you in this wonderful adventure!!!!!
We are happy for you, too. I'm sorry that you've had negative comments, but I think everyone does once they get beyond a certain # of kids.
I hadn't thought about your pregnancy analogy, but think of it this way: when you are going through the process that you are right now, it's more like announcing that you are trying to get pregnant. Once you are approved and through all the initial stuff and hear the you have kids coming, I think for more people it will be like the pregnancy announcement at that point. I'm not saying that you aren't excited like you're pregnant, but others might not be able to get excited until the event is further along, just like you don't get the same excitement when you say "we're hoping to get pregnant soon" as when you say "I'm due in 8 months."
Hoping the process goes smoothly for you!
That is a good point Tami. I guess it would be like when I've heard a friend say that their husband had agreed that they could start trying. Thanks :-)
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