Update

Not a whole lot to update, but I thought I would post something so you all know that I'm still here!

The paperwork part of the application is nearly done! It's close enough that the agency has decided to go ahead and assign us to a case manager and start our homestudy process. While I know that many people have their homestudy done in one day, our case manager told us that the first meeting will only consist of the interviews that Ryan and I will do together and we will do our separate ones on a different day. She also mentioned something about interviewing the kids, so I'm not really sure what to expect with that.

I have been watching like a hawk checking the public data base frequently. On one hand I am encouraged for the children because there used to be 3 pages that showed up in my search range but now there is only one. On that one page none of the sibling groups match what we are looking for (everyone younger than Tyler). I have to keep reminding myself that most adoption matches are not done through this website but through our case manager. Most children never make it to the website.

So that's about it! Homestudy soon, then fire and health inspections! Anyone want to come help me clean?

Legal Risk

I realized that I used the term "Legal Risk" in my last post but didn't give a definition. So here it is to the best of my understanding.

When a child is removed from a home the state of Texas gives the parents and extended family 18 months to clean up their act and do what is needed to get their children back. Some cities move faster than 18 months. Some probably move slower. But here the judge has to make the decision in 18 months. During that time the children are in foster care. Many people in foster care are hoping to adopt the children in their homes but you really have no idea what the chances of that will be. People that go this route are considered Foster-to-Adopt.

The other end of that spectrum is matched adoption. These are children whose parents have had their parental rights terminated. When Texas terminates parental rights it terminates on the whole family. This means that after termination Aunt Mary from Missouri can't come back and claim a niece or nephew. So these children are living in a foster home who don't intend to adopt them. A family will find out about these children and start taking the steps to adopting them. After they are placed in your home they stay there for about 6 months until you go to court and they are 100% yours. (read: the state quits coming into your house every month!)

The middle ground is called "Legal Risk". Technically there is no license for legal risk. It's just in the mind of your caseworker. An example of legal risk would be an abandoned infant. If a parent abandons their infant then they have 3 months to come back and claim them. During that time the baby is in a home that is licensed for foster care. If the mother does not reclaim her child then parental rights are terminated on and the child can be adopted. In the time that our city has had the "Baby Moses" law in effect only one child has been reclaimed. Another example would be if our caseworker knew of some children who had been in foster care for 12 months and the parents were not trying to get their children back. It looks pretty good that there will be termination in 6 months but they can't guarantee that. Another good example would be if a mother had had more than one termination in the past with previous children and now she has another baby in foster care. The chances are pretty good that she won't get this baby back either.

So there you have it. Clear as mud, right?

Next Step

We finished the PRIDE class and have submitted all of the paperwork. The next thing we will be waiting for is the referral forms to come back, the background checks from Colorado and Maryland to come back, and the appointments next week to get the TB tests done. In the meantime we might fill our time with some chicken pox. You never know...

After all of the above things have cleared then we'll have the homestudy, fire & health inspections, and the FBI fingerprinting and then we'll be licensed! As of right now we have decided to go ahead and do the dual licensing for foster care and adoption. While we plan on doing a matched adoption we found out that there are times that a legal risk may make sense. We have to be licensed for foster care in order to do a legal risk adoption.

Try as I might, I can't seem to stay off of the TARE website! I was a little sad today when I discovered that a sibling group that I had been planning to ask about is no longer listed. They were there last week, but they are gone now. I am sad for me, but I am happy that this means that they have a forever family :-)

In other news we found out that we can't post pictures of the kids until they are 100% legally ours. I was completely disappointed about that since I would have wanted to put pictures up here as soon as I found out who the kids are! But if you know me personally then I can email the pictures to you. I just can't post them here or on FB. Politics....

Congratulations!!!

Congratulations to my friends! I have two friends that are both with their children right now in their birth countries. The Tossells have adopted a little boy from Russia and will be bringing him home in about a week and a half!

The Cambrons have adopted a brother and sister in Ethiopia. Their dad is with them right now and will be bringing them home soon, although I'm not sure exactly when.

Books

As with most things in my life I tend to do a lot of research. Adoption is no different. I have spent countless hours talking with people whose lives have been touched by adoption. I've read books, online articles, blogs, etc. The most recent book I have purchased is Brothers and Sisters in Adoption. Ryan and I will read it together starting next week. I've glanced at it a bit and it does look really good.

What are your favorite books about adoption? What was the most helpful?

Another Adoption Song

This one is more about a birth mom who gave up her son at birth. I dare you not to cry. (OK, I dare the mothers out there not to cry)



Here's the story behind the song.

All I Really Want

Ever have those moments where you realize that not everyone knows about your favorite song? Recently I learned that not everyone has heard of this song. Enjoy!